Recipe for an Outstanding 30th Birthday

I was a little bummed that this would be the first birthday that didn't include a cake.

Silly? Yes. But it's tradition. (And I could really have used a birthday wish.)

However, my 30th birthday celebration ended up being spectacular. And because of that, I'd like to share my
Recipe for an Outstanding 30th Birthday*

Ingredients:

1 Person celebrating her 30th birthday
1 Killer party outfit (play around with this; be comfortable and adorbs.)
A handful of friends (feel free to combine old and new)
1 Package 30th birthday hats and other paraphernalia
2 to 5 favorite beverages (I chose vodka sodas with lime juice)
1 to 3 birthday shots (Stoli Blueberry works well)
1 Improv Jam
3 rounds of “Sex with Me is like...” where you're the “Me” (It's an improv game. Get your mind out of the gutter.
1 Taxi cab backing into your car
1 couple composed of a female from Chicago in Ugg Boots and a male from Minnesota who just met
1 random dude on the street
1 drive home at 5:30 in the morning.

Instructions:

Take person celebrating her 30th birthday and combine with killer party outfit. Feel free to check and change until just right.

Combine 30th birthday girl and outfit with the handful of friends. Laugh loudly and laugh often.

Randomly put on and take off different “It's my 30th!” paraphernalia items throughout the evening.

Introduce the favorite beverages and birthday shots periodically throughout the evening.

Throw birthday girl into the Improv Jam and top off with “Sex with Me is Like...” making sure she's in a chair on stage, basically getting roasted (to perfection of course. A little burn here and there never hurt either.)

Move birthday girl to another bar, make sure to fold in a minor collision with an angry cab driver (not too rough, don't leave any damage.)

Leave last location, stir in one couple made of one woman from Chicago and one man from Minnesota. Don't stir too quickly as the two should not combine, although the woman should introduce the man initially as, “This my baby!”

Toss in one random guy walking down the street to make sure Miss Chicago separates from Mr. Minnesota. Watch that pair walk away down the street.

Laugh some more.

After a total of 5 hours, the birthday celebration should be complete, in need only of a drive back home at 5:30 in the morning.


*Birthday cake completely optional and unnecessary.

For added fun, start of with an appetizer of doing something you've never done before. Performing a choreographed dance routine for a video shoot is highly recommended.